In the Land of Ardithian today would be one of those days that you would find me muttering under my breath the words, “Holy Cow Moly this can’t be it.” Occasionally I get in this state, this state of being and feeling and moving through a discombobulated world and not feeling grounded or connected to serenity, as if I had lost it under a rock and am frantically turning rocks over to see if it lies beneath one. It is in these moments that I know I am spread too thin, that my self inflicted desire to connect and be all that I can be to myself and others has gotten out of hand and I have lost the most important point of focus that makes all of that beautiful living possible. In this moment, you would see me smack the pause button and take a deep breath.
Then, you would see me grab a paint brush, turn on some tunes, take another deep breath, and paint/pray my way back to peace. 45 years I have walked this planet and although I have always been enthusiastically optimistic, I have struggled with peace most of those days. Painting, or at the very least creating, is one way I have found that instantly brings me to a balanced state of being and I wish so much I had been aware of its power back in the day. With all that said, I sit here smiling, not just smiling, grinning a big ole cheesy grin because despite all of that rock turning, at my core I am right where I need to be, right on the path of loving myself and others, and right on the path of allowing my faith to guide my steps, and for that….I am deeply grateful.
In the next few weeks there will be several wonderful opportunities that I am part of, including a new mixed media show with my dear friend Mary Elizabeth Kimbrough at Church of the Reedemer, I will be teaching in April at the Art by the Sea Retreat through the Mary C. O’Keefe center in Ocean Springs, and I am starting Flora Bowley’s online course this Monday to fine tune my intuitive painting style in acrylic. My mixed media classes have started back at Lavretta Art Center, my online mixed media group on Google+ is growing and thriving, Art(ology) is wonderful and doing well, and my friendships and connections through my art world, my faith world, and my family are beautiful. What is so incredible about all of this is that so far, my body is allowing me to do it. That is a miracle folks, especially for those of you who know my medical history.
Through the pain, I will create. Through the funk, I will create. Through the dark days and the light days, the days that are discombobulated and the days that are seamless, I will create. For when I create, I breathe, and when I breathe I pray, and when I pray, I am heard, and when I am heard, miracles and weirdness happen. Those are the moments that make the discombobulated days manageable, and those are the ones I seek.
Here is a sneak peek of some new miniature collages I am working on. They are 4″ by 4″ and created using hand painted papers . What I love about these are the subtle landscapes you can see throughout the abstractness. They remind me a bit of the nuance between the line I walk between serenity and chaos, and how when the pieces come together the whole has room to breathe.
|“Reeds of Discontent” $60
Peace to you friends!